Where Do I Begin?

A Christian Mama has boundless opportunities to use her gifts and abilities. But how is she to know what God wants her to do with all the opportunities to serve Jesus and others in our busy and fast-paced world?

Right now our busy world has come to an abrupt full on stop. The virus has us indoors and away from the busyness of life. Though it’s frustrating, think about the gift hidden in the hardship. It’s the gift of TIME. How often have we been able to stop the clock? Never in my lifetime. I purpose we not waste these moments in worry and what-ifs. Instead, let’s embrace this shut down as an opportunity to reflect.

A God given pause.

Don’t waste the pause.

Allow me to share a bit of my own reflections with you today. As I think back on my parenting years, I longed to be the best Mom and to serve Jesus. But in serving, I allowed myself to be pulled in every direction imaginable. I was a wife, mom, teacher, counselor, pastor’s wife, friend, employee, leader, and more.

I remember feeling confused about how to order my life. My home of origin had lacked order and been dysfunctional, and as a result, I often felt aimless as an adult, like a boat without a rudder.

I look back and think, Girl! What were you thinking? You didn’t have a clue.

Head on over to The Glorious Table to read the rest of my article. I pray that you will find help as you juggle the responsibilities and opportunities in your life…

Be Still and Know that I am God – How?

Through these days of Covid-19, riots and rebellion, the Spirit whispers, “Be still and know that I am God.” “Yes, Lord,” I say, “I hear you, but what does that mean, how do I still myself?

As I meditate on this verse, applications open on a conscious level. In the flesh, I wrestle with thoughts, my attempts to distract myself, and the driving force to over-focus on the news. But the spirit (the one who never leaves or forsakes me) continues to whisper, “Be still and know that I am God.” As I hear his voice, I let the Spirit have His way in my heart.

My Thoughts

My thoughts run – they resist being still. They take on a life of their own. I try to figure things out. I am driven to find solutions. I get on social media to read source’s I trust, godly leaders. I gather all kinds of information. Evil is running rampant. I want to be part of the solution. How do I stand against evil? When is it time to stand up for our constitutional rights?

Distraction

Just keep busy, don’t think about it. Stick your head in the sand and let the world do what the world will do. Scroll through Facebook, let’s see what people are up to on Instagram, who is tweeting on twitter. Don’t read posts that bring me down. Avoid any news about the virus or the government. Keep my mind so full I can’t think about this worldwide pandemic, the riots, the madness and lawlessness. Call my kids, call my friends, laugh and remember the good times (not in and of itself a bad thing.) Right in the midst the spirit of God whispers, “Be still and know that I am God.” How can we discern the will of God, how can we be His hands and feet, how can we be responsible citizens, how can God use us if we avoid reality?

All the while the Spirit whispers, “Be still and know that I am God. As I still my thoughts, I listen. The word of God tells me:

Hyperfocus

The opposite of distraction is hyper-focus. It’s not healthy to fill our minds with all the problems in the world. During this pandemic, I believe we need to hear the live presentations of our President and leaders. I listen to live presentations and then turn the news off. Commentators and news reporters share biased opinions. I want to hear the source itself. As I listen, I pray God sheds His light and grants wisdom so I may discern what is true. “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” James 1:5

The Holocaust

As I am tempted to distract myself from what’s going on in the world, I am reminded of the period of time when the Nazi’s determined to wipe out the Jewish people. The Holocaust! Rather than relay my memories of the horrific event, allow me to share an article by Charles Harris.

After a speech, an old man approached pro-life activist Penny Lea. Weeping, he told her the following story:

“I lived in Germany during the Nazi holocaust. I considered myself a Christian. I attended church since I was a small boy. We had heard the stories of what was happening to the Jews, but like most people today, we tried to distance ourselves from the reality of what was taking place. What could anyone do to stop it?

A railroad track ran behind our small church, and each Sunday morning we would hear the whistle from a distance and then the clacking of the wheels moving over the track. We became disturbed when one Sunday we noticed cries coming from the train as it passed by. We grimly realized that the train was carrying Jews. They were like cattle in those cars!

Week after week that train whistle would blow. We would dread to hear those old wheels because we knew that the Jews would cry out to us as they passed our church. It was so terribly disturbing! We could do nothing to help these poor miserable people, yet their screams tormented us. We knew exactly at what time that whistle would blow, and we decided the only way to keep from being so disturbed by the cries was to sing our hymns. By the time that train came rumbling past the churchyard, we were singing at the top of our voices. If some screams reached our ears, we’d just sing a little louder until we could hear them no more.

Years have passed, and no one talks about it much anymore, but I still hear that train whistle in my sleep. I can still hear them crying out for help. God forgive all of us who called ourselves Christians, yet did nothing to intervene.”

This dear tormented saint warns us, don’t stick your head in the sand. Don’t pretend nothing is happening. Be informed, listen to the spirit of God. What would he have us do? It’s a dark world. How do we shine our light for Jesus?

Stand for Righteousness

I believe as Christians we stand for righteousness. For me, that means finding ways and means to support righteousness in our government.

We live in a country that is set up with accountability. Our forefathers left England and their tyrannical rules to set up a country that honored God and respected the rights of people. We are one nation under God. We are a nation of the people for the people and by the people.

So, when our governor steps out of line, when she refuses to work with the senate and the legislative branches of our government (as our laws dictate) she is breaking the law constitutionally. She is accountable to the people.

“Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me.” Matt. 10:38

Know that God is in Control

“God is the blessed controller of all things, the king over all kings and the master of all masters.” 1 Timothy 6:15 If the world shuts down, if a virus takes lives, If all of our rights get taken away, God is still God. Has he not told us these things would come to pass?

Sitting quietly, I weigh all the information and ask God what to do with it? I pray for the Holy Spirit to search my heart. I am human, and that humanness has the power to lead me astray. So, I surrender my heart and my will to Him. I pray and read His word. I ask Him to lead me in the way I should go. I am not all knowing – but God is.

I am Secure in Christ

I remember I am secure in Christ. “I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.” John 1-:28-30

I remember he is Jehovah Jirah. God provides. “And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.” Phil. 4:19 And I am reminded that God meets my needs, not necessarily my wants.

Give Thanks

I Give thanks, which opens the door to peace. “Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.” Col. 3:15

Pray

I pray – even when I don’t know what to say, “In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words; and He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.” Romans 8:26-28

Let The Spirit Have His Way

Only in stillness do we hear the voice of the spirit. Only in the quietness of communion with God do we sense His presence. Only as we hear His words through the Bible do we understand that He works ALL things together for our good and His glory.

During these unsettling days, Covid-19 tempts us. Our thoughts open to all kinds of recklessness. Fear, what if’s, uncertainty and emotions that open the door to the enemy. Being prepared means having a plan. Close the door! Sound simple? Not so simple, but you have a choice to dwell in an unhealthy pool of damaging emotions or fill your thoughts with Him. Think about His faithfulness, think about His provisions, think about how He saved you and rescued you from a certain eternal death. Allow His word to lift you.

Distraction will tempt! We run and hide from pain. We busy ourselves to avoid feeling uncomfortable. Instead, sit in reality; on purpose. We are human. God created us with emotions. Avoiding your feelings, pushing them down, leads to depression. Cry it out to God. Ask God what He is up to. He can handle your questions. You are His child forever, and ever. Noone and nothing can take you out of His hands. “I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand.” John 10:28

Weep

Pour it all out to God! Weep as Job wept. “My face is flushed from weeping, and deep darkness is on my eyelids” Job 16:16

David wept when the Amalekites raided, overthrew and burned Ziklag. The Amalekites took their wives and children captive. “Then David and the people lifted their voices and wept until there was no strength in them to weep.” I Samuel 30:4

There is a time to weep. “a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance” Ecclesiastes 3:4.

For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime! Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning” Ps. 30:5. And there will be a time for JoY, once more.

In The Meantime

As we face reality and realize the world’s a mess, when the time is right, the Holy Spirit will reveal our role. We don’t have to figure it out. Until that time, let’s pray, trust God, serve those in vulnerable spaces and love our brothers and sisters.

Fall if you must, knowing his everlasting arms are beneath you. “The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.” Deut. 33:27

“But when He, the Spirit of truth, comes, He will guide you into all the truth; for He will not speak on His own initiative, but whatever He hears, He will speak; and He will disclose to you what is to come.” John 16:13

Covid-19 God is in Control

The threat of CoVid-19 is real. What are your children learning as they observe you?   

The thing about parenting is, when we start out, we have so little experience in life. We haven’t been knocked down enough to be challenged in our faith. So, how do we lead our children to process such a time as this? Years of walking with Jesus through the good, bad and ugly times of life is what builds our faith. Years of clinging to Him prepares us for such a time as this.   

Many of us are feeling out of control. As the ‘older’ woman to many of you, I’d like to share some out-of-control situations from my life. Situation to helpless situation, God built (and continues to build) my trust in who He is! Situation to situation, God will build your faith too – right in the midst of your scariest days.

We are living through unprecedented days with Covid-19. Anxiety is lurking in the air. Fear welcomes all who breathe it in. Dread threatens, “You have absolutely NO control!” And we shudder.

COVID-19

Covid-19 hit our world, and it’s gone silent

As we sit in our homes, some in complete isolation, God is on His throne.

Our human frailty quakes at the loss of control

Our imagination takes us to places that chill us to the bones

Will we die?

Will our family die?

Will our friends die?

What about our children?

Is the government taking over?

Will we soon be living under Marshall law?

PREFACE

Would you join me for a brief walk through some of my life experiences? Come, take a peak as I open a sliver of the past. I’m inviting you to witness how God meets me on the other side of fear. This is where He waits to teach me. In Him I am safe. He is the Blessed Controller of all things.

As long as I can remember I have had this underlying wish to be in control of my circumstances. I grew up in dysfunction and chaos. My life felt out of control. When I left home to attend a Christian college, I encountered a sense of order and control. It was a wonderful respite from my past.

Looking back, I realize that I have lived an out-of-control life through various circumstances. I’ve lived it over, and over, and over again.

SIX SITUATIONS when GOD SHOWED ME HE is IN CONTROL – I am NOT!

Situation #1

Soon after I married the love of my life, a church called Gary to be their Youth and Music Pastor. It was our first ministry, and in was brutal. Though we loved the congregation fiercely, our Pastor demanded control. When a friend addressed my husband as Pastor Gary, (which was his title) the senior Pastor growled, “I am the only Pastor of this Church, you will not address him as Pastor!” Then there was the Pastor’s wife. She sneered my way when the women at Church surrounded me for a glimpse of my newborn. One night, the Pastor’s wife chewed me out because I confronted her teenaged daughter on her bad attitude. I was nine months pregnant, yet she railed on me and then walked me to the Pastor’s office where he joined her in demeaning me. I sobbed all the way home. Once home, I tripped up the stairs, blinded by my tears. I had no control! As a new Pastor’s wife, I looked forward to learning from our Pastor and his wife. They shattered my hope. I was at the mercy of mean-spirited, supposed, ‘Christian’ leadership. When I relayed this story to a college professor friend, she said,

“Susie, you have just been in school to learn a lesson in ‘how NOT to be.'” She continued, “And don’t you ever treat a person the way she treated you!”

Her words were as a healing balm to my broken heart. There was something I could do with this. There was a lesson to learn. God never wastes a Hurt!

situation #2

After the birth of my baby girl, my hormones went wacky. I was a mess and couldn’t pull myself up by the bootstraps. I shamed myself for not trusting God enough. My emotions were utterly and helplessly out of control. My heart raced. I imagined my experience to be like sticking my finger in a light socket and not being able to pull it out! Merciless electrical shocks ravaged through my body. Any noise, music, talking, laughing had to be silenced because noise sent my nerves flying off the charts. I cried out to God over and over, but He was silent. I was a goner, helplessly at the mercy of endocrine dysfunction.

A goner, that is, until Jesus did what he always does

He reached out his strong arm and pulled me out of the pit. He sent help through my friend Annie. Annie called, “Susie, tell me all your symptom’s, Tom’s calling Mayo Clinic for you.” Tom contacted the head of endocrinology. And wonder upon wonder, this high level doctor called me at home that night. The first words out of her mouth were, “Who was that man?” My friend’s husband possesses a commanding nature, and when he speaks, people listen! (God’s provision.) The specialist from Mayo got my hormones back to normal. I embraced life with all of its joys once again.

While I was still sick, I met my friend Tracey through a local physician. The doctor didn’t know how to help us, but he put us together for support. Eventually, when we were well, we determined to reach women who were suffering as we had suffered. We held conferences at a local college. We taught women about hormonal imbalance and the disruptive symptoms that come with it. We shared resources and pointed them toward treatments. Women and their guys came in droves, there was a huge need! We featured Christian Physicians to discuss the condition, offer hope and provide solutions.

If I had not experienced this out-of-control situation, I might have judged those suffering from illnesses hard to diagnose. If I had not suffered, I’d have no clue how to help these women. God never wastes a Hurt!

situation #3

Another Church called Gary to serve as Christian Ed. Director, Youth and Music Pastor. In this Church, a close-knit group of friends surrounded us. One night, at a business meeting, the members learned the Churches funds were desperately low. It stunned us! After the meeting, Gary felt the only right thing to do was to step down from his position. He resigned, and suddenly we were without a paycheck. Though I wholeheartedly agreed with Gary’s decision, I had no control over what lay ahead. There was no plan. We had three children and no provision. The spirit whispered, “Susie, I am in control and you are my child, trust me with your life – Trust me.” It wasn’t long before one of our Church friends hired Gary as a carpenter. Also, a sister Church in the area took us under their wings and showered us with love and the largest amount of Christmas presents our family has ever experienced! God never wastes a Hurt!

Situation #4

My son was just 12 years old when passive-aggressive behaviors peeked out of his personality. This was just the beginning of a downward spiral into full-blown rebellion. I thought I could fix him. I read everything I could get my hands on regarding Christian parenting. I spent countless hours trying to reach my son’s heart. We employed the best Christian counseling available. As he continued to plummet, I prayed and prayed and prayed, asking God to fix him.

Years later, I lay shattered on my kitchen floor, “God, you are the Potter and I am the clay; I understand you have me in the furnace of refinement, but have you forgotten about me? Soon, there will be nothing left but ashes.” Even as I cried out, God sent one of his teenaged servants to minister to my boy. It took me countless years and tears to give up control. God kept whispering, “This boy, you call your son, He is my son, give him to me.” God kept chipping away at the concrete barrier around my heart until at last, He got through. When I released Daniel to God’s control, I watched as the Hound of Heaven relentlessly pursued my boy. I have never witnessed love like this before – or since. Daniel is God’s child, and God loves him more than I am capable of loving. God never wastes a Hurt!

Situation #5

We went through a traumatic season when our last Church split. God saved the Church and its testimony, but in the process my heart got shattered. I developed several autoimmune diseases. My doctor put me on medical leave and never released me. The wealthy of the Church attacked my husband’s character – the betrayal left deep wounds. The tensions built, even as the Church met several times a day for prayer. But peace reigned in that tiny room as we invited God to search our hearts. We plead with Him to keep the testimony of His Church alive. Eventually, there was a mass exodus – the wealthy of the Church left. God answered our prayers and cleaned house, but their exit meant Gary’s paycheck got cut in half. I had lost my job. My paycheck and the insurance I carried was gone. We tried to stay to build the Church back up but financially; we were in big trouble. Gary knew he must step down, this time as Senior Pastor of our beloved Church. Once again we had no paycheck. Many years into scarcity, I began calling out to Jehovah-jireh (God provides.) Our phone began ringing. Then the phone wouldn’t stop ringing. People called for Gary’s services. God was providing the money we needed. Every time the phone rang, I lifted my hands and cried out, Jehovah Jirah – You are my provider. I danced and felt real JoY right in the midst of poverty. We didn’t lose our house, as we feared. He met our basic needs and since has gone beyond. God never wastes a Hurt!

Situation #6

Last year my husband experienced a deadly reaction to the drug Flagyl. We almost lost him. He is recovering but as a result, is experiencing many complex health issues. When he first fell ill, I found myself in the same place – no control whatsoever. But this time, it was different. All of my experiences taught me that Jesus is present in the storm’s midst. He was calling me with outstretched arms saying, “Come unto me all ye that are weak and heavy laden and I will give you rest.” My daughters were as ministering angels during this time. We cared for Gary around the clock. He felt like his body was on fire. He was in torturous pain, and couldn’t sleep. The girls and I took shifts. We carried him when he couldn’t walk, we got him in and out of the bathtub day and night, we played music to soothe his suffering, we fed him, we comforted him in whatever way possible. One day he put his arms around all three of us and cried, “I have the best family on earth! Who does this?” Tears were streaming down his face. God’s manifest presence was palpable. God surrounded us with Himself as songs of peace enveloped us. God never wastes a Hurt!

There are many other situations I could share, but I think you get the picture. I wrote these remembrances and opened these vulnerable spaces of my heart to say,

God is patient and loving and He’ll do whatever it takes to teach us He is in control.

He is God, and we are not. I was never in control, not ever!

Many years ago, (during my fearful ‘Susie’ years) my friend, Sally said, “Susie, don’t cross that bridge before it’s time – God is not in this moment to save you from what you imagine is on the other side. BUT He will be on the other side should you need to cross that bridge.” Her words comforted me, and I’ve never forgotten the wisdom held in her analogy.

So, dear friends, have confidence! God will not waste this CoVid-19 experience in your life. He is the Potter we are the clay. He is working in the midst of this storm. When we get to the other side, when our Redeemer reaches his strong arm to rescue us, our faith, in who He is, will be stronger.

ONLY GOD

Only God has authority to calm the raging storms

Only God has the power to reach into a heart and change it

Only God is able to meet our needs

You see, after we walk with the Lord through:

out-of-control real-life situations

hearing His voice instructing, “I am God – you are not!”

experiencing betrayal from people you trusted

He waits on the other side. There are lessons to learn. This a time to grow.

If we don’t go through the storm, how can we know He is on the other side? How do we learn He is in control of everything? God allows bad things to happen to good people to grow our roots of trust deeper. They grow deeper with each storm.

THE REMEDY

The only remedy for a fearful heart is trust in God and God alone. We all have an opportunity, right now, to see God in all His glory take care of His kids. God walks with us through the storms of life to grow us.

GOD IS

our security

our rescuer

our creator

our provider

our redeemer

the lover of our souls.

May God continue to grow us as we face this unprecedented time with Covid-19.

God is deserving of all of our hope, all of our trust, and all of our praise.

I LOVE this song and it’s the perfect summation of this writing. “As I look back on this road I’ve traveled, I see so many times he’s carried me through, and if there’s one thing, I’ve learned in my life, My Redeemer is Faithful and true.” Steven Curtis Chapman.

My Redeemer is Faithful and True by Steven Curtis Chapman

COVID-19 Thankful!

Nana’s Lovenotes: A Love note to my Grandgirls,

Hey my sweet girls. How are you all doing? I can picture each of you tucked away from the rest of the world. I miss you! I bet you’re puzzled by the title of this love note, right? Are you thinking, “Nana, what are you up to?”

I’m sorry to trick you with a title that doesn’t seem to make sense, but let me explain. First, am I thankful for this Virus? No, not at all. Am I afraid of this virus, honestly, sometimes a teeny bit, but not much. I know that God is in control, and he has my days numbered. No one and nothing can take me until he says, “Susie, it’s time to enter your forever home.” Years of walking with Him has given me a deep trust in who He is!

When you’ve lived as long as I have, when you’ve walked through the fire with Jesus by your side, you gain perspective. But let me tell you, in my younger years I’d be scared spitless. So, I’m writing you today hoping to lift you (if you are in a fearful place) into a place of trust and peace.

The rest of this article is on my blog dedicated to my grandgirls. You will find it here: https://nanaslovenotes.com/2020/04/04/covid-19-thankful/ See ya there. 🙂

Be In The Moment

The coronavirus is occupying space in all of our heads. Being in this space reminds me of earlier days when God taught me the importance of being in the moment.

Parents, most of you have your children safely tucked in your home. In Michigan, we are ordered to shelter in place for three weeks. We have never experienced this before. These are unprecedented moments. Moments we have the opportunity to connect as a family.

I remember back to raising my teens. The teen years turned out to be nightmare years with one of my teens. Because I was so focused on my one, I lost significant moments with my other two.

At one of my highest points of anxiety, my friend, counselor, and Pastor’s wife said, “Susie, get yourself in the moment. Look outside your window. Observe the trees in all their glory reaching up to the creator. Stop whatever you are doing, whatever you are thinking and BE in the moment.” I remember staring at my beautiful Maple tree and observing the many hues of gold, red and yellow. I hadn’t enjoyed my favorite tree in a long time. She continued, “Get yourself in the moment with your girls. Listen to them and BE present with them. Experience life with them. Your mind is drifting off to the what ifs. You’re obsessing, trying to fix your son.”

My precious friend called me out! I needed it; I didn’t see it. Her wise counsel turned out to be one of the best pieces of advice I ever received.

As an older woman to many of you, let me urge you to be in the moment with each of your children. Observe their unique perspectives, gifts and enjoy their presence.

When you find your thoughts drifting off into busyness or worry or things you can’t control, reign your run away thoughts back in and be in the moment, Treasure this time, invest yourself in each child God entrusted to you.

Parenting in Love

Parenting is not as simple as I thought it would be.  It’s not like kids come with instructions. To complicate things, each child is unique and has her/his own set of strengths and weaknesses. How does a parent raise up a child who is confident and humble at the same time? 

This writing does not originate from a perfect parent. Believe me, I learned tons through the messes of my parenting years.

This message springs from a little girl who wondered why no one had rescued her. The brutality of her father loomed as it squeezed every ounce of security from her world.

This article is written by a mother who begged God for wisdom as she raised her children. My deepest desire was to love them as God loved me. His love changed my life. His boundless grace healed the brokenness of abandonment.

We as parents are the first example of authority to our children. A child’s father or mother paints a picture of authority the child will carry throughout his/her lifetime. A parent’s challenge is to use their authority to love unconditionally, discipline for the child’s good, impart value, create security, and plant hope in a child’s heart.  

What happens when your child disobeys? Is your focus to meet your child’s needs? Are you embarrassed at his/her behavior, thinking more about your reputation than your role in your child’s life? Do you reign in your emotions to exhibit true humility (power under control)? A parent who is self-controlled will gain the respect of her/his child.

We as parents hold the power to diminish, devalue, humiliate, crush, destabilize and throw a child’s entire world into chaos. Yes, we have the power to control our kid’s outward actions. But if that is our main goal, we’ve already lost the battle. Parents, we have a choice; We may exploit our child or responsibly use our position to shepherd his/her heart.

Imagine this scenario. You are at a gathering with your friends. Your friend, Becky, is ready to leave. She turns to her six-year-old son and says, “It’s time to go Billy, pick up your toys.” Billy stretches to his 4 foot little self and yells, “No! I am not going!” He stomps his foot, “I’m playing!” “Billy, you get off your butt and put those toys away NOW!” Billy yells back, “You’re just stupid!” Becky grabs her little boy’s small arm and growls, “You listen to me young man, you pick up those toys or I will spank you, right here, right now!”

Tell me, do you think Becky is justified? When your child is defiant, how do you respond? Do you have a meltdown and act like an unbridled juvenile? Do you grab your child’s tiny arm, tower over him, and scream in his little face?

Consider these questions. Do you see how this mother reflects the same behavior as her child? What effect will bullying and humiliation have on her child? Do you think her child will respect her? Do you suppose this rant will bring good results? 

What behaviors will authoritarian parenting create in a kid?  I can think of a few; lack of respect for authority, resentment, distrust, anger, discouragement, depression, cruelty, revenge, even hatred. How does a child emotionally process downgrading treatment?

Let’s take this same scenario and play it out as a responsible, loving parent. Your six-year-old defies you in public. As his caretaker, your role is to parent him/her. As the adult, you keep your emotions in check and send up a prayer for self-control. You understand that allowing your child to defy you leads to nothing good. As the guardian over your child’s life, you lead your charge away from the eyes of the crowd. 

You have this conversation, “Son, when I told you to pick up your toys, you defied me and called me stupid.” Pause – “This is unacceptable. Defiance always gets a consequence.” Pause –  “As your mom, I cannot allow you to disrespect me.” During pauses you pray your emotions do not impede a teachable moment. “Son, look at Mommy.” As your child dares to look into your eyes he reads concern, disappointment, but mostly love. “What were you thinking when you challenged me?” The child may say, “I was mad,” or “I didn’t want to leave.” You respond, “Did defying me get you what you wanted?” Allow your child to process. “Did refusing to do what I asked help you in any way?” Pause again. “Son, this behavior will have stiff consequences.” You determine what is stiff to that child.” Open your arms as an invitation to hug. He/she will either hug or not. It doesn’t matter, the child knows you love him.

As a wise parent, you take a disturbing moment and use it to help the child think about his behavior and the consequences that follow. You contribute to shaping his character.

If you have a tendency to abuse authority as a parent, please go to God. Ask Him to help you see your child through His eyes. See your child as God’s creation ready to soak up your love, direction, and discipline bathed in love. If you cannot control your actions, if you rage before you think, seek help before it is too late to reverse the damaging results of unbridled anger.  

Christian Parenting FB Page

Hello Friends, I’ve not been posting lately on my heart called passion – parenting. The reason is that I am working hard to develop a Facebook page that will bring a community of parents together. A safe place to interact with mentors and those still in the trenches of doing one of the most important job on earth – raising up a godly generation. .

I am inviting you, parent, mentor, grandparent and caretaker, to my Facebook page where you’ll find an amazing group of friends doing life together.

Here is the announcement I have up on the page:  Parents are you looking for a community of Christian parents to pour into your life? Are you in need of a mentor? You’ve found that community. Welcome to our Christian Parenting Blog on Facebook.

Our gifted Christian Bloggers will post their articles on this page. You will find a wealth of wisdom from bloggers who have learned (mentors) or are learning in the trenches of raising a godly generation.

This is an interactive site. We’ll post questions to start a conversation and give you an opportunity to get to know each other. When we post a blog by one of our contributors, if it touches your heart, or if you have questions, reach out to the author of the article. Have a conversation.

Please share this site with your friends and let’s create a group of God fearing, loving, truth telling, devoted friends. Ready, Set, Let’s Grow.

Learn Your Childs Unique Bent

God hasn’t just sent you to do his work in the lives of your children; He will use the lives of your children to advance his work in you.” – Paul David Tripp

Do you ever say, “I wish I could go back?” I do! There is a steep learning curve in parenting. If you didn’t have great role models, the learning curve is even greater. My writing will expose my journey, the good, the bad, and the ugly events of parenthood. God held the answers and when I sought Him, He showed up and grew me as a Mom.

As I raised my wild, rambunctious first-born son, my quiet and content daughter and my happy-go-lucky baby girl, there were times I felt clueless. I mean, there were no instructions attached. Each child was unique, and I spent countless hours learning who these little people were. As I grew to understand the way God created them, I fell madly in love with each child and had a better understanding of how to raise each one.

Through God’s word I learned He purposefully created each child with his/her own set of strengths and weaknesses. “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.” Psalm 139:13 – 14. I did not birth cookie cutter kids. Each one is different. “Train up a child in the way he should go; (uniqueness – or according to his bent) even when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Prov. 22:6

Would you like to know more about raising unique kids? Head on over to The Glorious Table to read an article I wrote and explore this topic further. Parenting Your Unique Children With Grace.

God Bless you, dear parent for seeking to raise kids who shine for Jesus and further his kingdom. I encourage you to spend much time in God’s word, for in those God breathed pages, you will receive counsel and wisdom from your creator, and the lover of your soul.